he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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