he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I am mentally ready for anal.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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