In the future we'll all be gay
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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