I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Randomize
