Dual....:-)
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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