i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
