3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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