We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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