Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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