I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
