How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Randomize
