That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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