i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
