So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
