So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize