; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
The power of my boobs compel you
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Randomize
