But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
