dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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