# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
