Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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