We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
