it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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