Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
