not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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