That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
