honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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