is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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