butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize