are you still at the devil's house?
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
