do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
