So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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