my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize
