; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize