when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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