OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
