i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
