Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
