And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
