I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
This is my gift to your gina
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
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