Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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