just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize
