I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
