Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Someone shit on the floor
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
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