Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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