In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
