I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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