32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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