I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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