addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
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