also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
