I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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